Don’t worry, you’re not alone. There are roughly 13.6 million single parents alone. Your job as a single mom is not unusual, and we want to shed some light on how single parenthood, though with its challenges can be seen as a time to find new outlets for support and growth.
When we hear expecting moms say that they don’t want to be a “single parent”, we have discovered that this usually means is, “I don’t believe that I can support my baby on my own” or “I can’t give my baby what I think he/she needs in life”. Hence, many will choose abortion, adoption, or Safe Surrender as an alternative.
Today we explore 5 ways you can feel empowered to become a single parent. For most, single parenting is not desirable. However, it’s the reality for almost 14 million people, and that might just include you.
Find support from family and friends.
As a single parent, you might think you’re alone in this, but have you considered reaching out to family members and friends? If you are living with your parents, you will need to tell them at some point that you are pregnant and their initial reaction might not be welcoming, but just as you need time to process everything that is going on, they do too. Talk to them about how they can support you and let them know what you plan on doing as a single parent. Create a plan about how you will continue studies, go to work, or stay home with your child. Planning out your goals with your parent’s support will foster healthy communication for when the baby arrives.
However, if you are living on your own, you might fear that taking care of your baby will be too much work. For that reason, it is important you talk to those closest to you, and ask them to rally around you during and after pregnancy. Let them know what your fears and concerns are and ask them to be there for you. Maybe they can’t stay up every night with you to feed your baby, but they can help you clean up the house, give you time to yourself to take a nap or shower while they care for the baby for a few hours. Think of other ways you believe they can help and reach out to them. You’d be surprised how many are willing to give you a hand.
Get motherly support.
You can find this from mom, family members, or friends. Look for someone that is experienced in motherhood and ask them to help you on this journey through pregnancy and postpartum. Many mothers have dealt with the same issues as you, so don’t be afraid to share your doubts with people you trust. Being a single parent might seem like a daunting future, but trust that other mothers who have been in similar situations will have the experience and knowledge to help you.
Find support in your community.
In some cities there are organizations that offer parenting classes, birth classes, or will even go out to your home and help you with prenatal and postpartum care. Call your local pregnancy center or your OBGYN to get information about the different agencies in your area. If you live in Bakersfield, you can attend parenting classes at the Bakersfield Pregnancy Center or get special attention and assistance from your very own nurse through Nurse Family Partnership.
Be your biggest support.
Becoming a single parent means that you will have to be the mom and dad on different occasions, but that doesn’t mean you have to abandon your other roles. You can still be a student, employee, athlete, etc. You can still achieve previous goals in your life, as well as create new ones for your child. It’s not too late to go back to school or get a better job to support you and your child. Many women have made new friendships during their pregnancy and had successful marriages while having children from previous relationships.
Get spiritual support.
If you are attending church, talk to your pastor or pastor’s wife to see how they can support you and your child. The church family can provide you with helpful resources in the church and community. Many times, churches have a mom’s support group and offer childcare so that you can attend church services.
You can also check out Embracegrace.com to get connected with other single and pregnant moms that are looking for support and encouragement.
Remember, you are not alone and you have support. Being a single mother does not mean that you will be alone in this. If you are struggling to provide for you and your new one or are considering abortion or adoption as an option, call our office to get more information and assistance. All our services are free and confidential. Make an appointment online.
We are here for you.
-BPC Staff
Call (661)326-1907 for help today!